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This is my corner... If you're looking for trouble, please leave me alone...
Not a very good way to start a post but well that's how i'm feeling now... close to depression actually. A mixture of fear and sadness, definitely not something you want to experience.
Today, as I sat in the grand audi staring at the people and the names appearing on screen, i can't help but start thinking of so many things...
Today, we received our Olevel chinese result back. Xeap. No joke, the first paper of the many.
I was expecting a A2/B3 but when Domokun actually said our whole class all As, I didn't know why but I had this sudden hope that I'll get A1.
All I know is that when I received the slip and took a look, I couldn't feel anything.
"Sigh. Winnie, not here, not now."
Was what ran through my mind so many times when I was in the grand audi.
I'm not sure if it was because of the effect but I just felt super sian from then onwards.
Never felt so sian before.
I tried my very best to distract myself by working hard for the straw and egg game but afterthat, I felt that wave of emptiness...
_____
When I entered the lift, I was trying very hard to hold it in...
Entered my house quietly as I realised that my mum and brother were both busy with the computer and slipped into my room.
Closed the door behind me and cried.
Sometimes I really feel like punching myself. Why the hell have I turned so weak?!
Then I thought again. It really is very difficult when you sit there with a higher expectation.
Everyone around you is getting A1 and fishball noodle soup you're getting a bloody A2.
Hence, I can never ever get 10A1s liao.
Then you'll be wondering why am I so kisiao, get so sensitive over a stupid chinese result.
Well, that's not the main point lar...
I can freakingly totally imagine myself sitting alone in BN emo-ing when everyone else goes on stage after their names show up on screen.
I'm scared, so scared.
I feel like I don't know myself anymore.
I'm a stupid poo poo that nobody cares about...
How...
_____
"A crazy storm cloud hovered above Tampines street 32. Who would have known that in such a rainy weather, there walked a black figure of a girl so stealthily so lonely. She held a bright red umbrella firmly in her right hand and that was the only colour that anyone could've seen on her. The girl's eyes were empty, her face was expressionless and the heart which used to beat a lively tempo throughout her entire body faded away. She was soulless.
Holding a bag of Chilli flavoured potato chips, the girl walked slowly and without hesitation through the ankle deep puddles that had formed on the pedestrian road she was walking on to get home from a shop two bus-stops away. The cold waters could have frozen anyone upon touch but she was numb, too numb to feel anything else other than fear. Her worst nightmare has awoken yet again. A black and emo aura emitted from her entire body as if to warn the drivers in the car to watch out when she crossed the road without looking. She didn't care anymore. Why should she?
All the encouragements the girl received are just words that won't really hold a single meaning unless the receiver believes. Right now, she doesn't and apparently won't ever will till tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow. "
If you ask me if I'm okay today, I'll tell you sincerely, I'm not...
But I assure you that when tomorrow comes, I will be alright... Promise...
Labels: frowns everyday...
Yesterday was a totally F.U.N. day!
Flag day for the whole cohort of my school all over Singapore. SO cool!
Took mrt to Dohby Ghaut, walked to The Cathay, then to bugis, followed by clarke Quay.
Later took mrt to Novena to have Gong Cha and finally back to school.
I have never felt so happy saying so many 'thank you's and I think I smiled till my teeth almost fell out. LOL! It feels good when people smile while taking their money out. It warms thy heart to know that you're helping perhaps 4 or 5 people be able to pay for their medical bills when they cannot and even influencing others to do so. By going around for donations, you're helping others get the opportunity to help others. I dont care if it's just 10cents or even a mere 5cents. Imagine so many of it can eventually make up millions! Just imagine.
I know I will never be able to match to those who started out young and wonderful like that guy who saved money to build wells and those who really go all out but, this is the least i can do and such chances are rare. =]
I sincerely hope for those who donated to have a great week~! =D
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Oh, btw, I intend to skip Day 7 for the letter challenge.
You want to know why?
Very simple. Who in the write mind will write to their ex crush. LOL
Most probably see on streets just 'halo o.o' then walk off. HAHA!
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Guess the lie...
1) I like public speaking
2) I had a gang
3) I started disliking band only in sec3.
Today was a fairytale...
Labels: Smilez everyday...
Just a random, average short girl who believes that life is a disaster in disguise as a blessing... Worrying has become a habit but anime will always remain engraved in my mind. =] Currently addicted to spacing out... And... Sleep is prioritised as number 1! People know me as Winnie. And I have roamed the Earth for 15 years. It all began on 14th September 1995...
2BN
6C
FLUTE
Amelia
Boon See
Celine
Celeste
Cherie
Cheryl
Cheng Cheng
Crystal
Denise the LOUD one
Eanxiang
Estee
Gloria
Firzanah
Hui Cong
Jeanette
Jia Ai
Jia Xin
Jillian
Jing Wei
Jing Ye
Ka Wing
Keith
Lee Hwee
Tan Winnie
Xin Hui
Xue Qi
Vincent
Vivian
Yu Li
Yun Jin
alone in the rain with a red umbrella walked a girl named winnie...
Making my life more meaningful than ever~
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