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This is my corner... If you're looking for trouble, please leave me alone...
Today was... difficult.
Shall start from the least to the most bothering thought.
_____
I lack exercise.
Yes.
After a simple 5station training yesterday, my stomach muscles ache like.. Creator knows how pain. A random cough, a gentle laugh and a soft push sends billions of dinosaurs biting at the affected area around my hips. No joke.
_____
I went for my president's judging today.
let's just say it was unexpected.
Found myself feeling SUPER inhumanly nervous when she stood at the end of the room.
I don't know much about wushu. I practically don't know anything at all.
I guess I don't really have any rights to say anything too.
I felt that leaving her alone would be the best...
I hate myself for not knowing what to say, not knowing what to do.
Fish.
I felt so freaking bad when I stood at the side witnessing her sudden change in look and stuff.
The results were just too unexpected even for her I guess.
The feeling of helplessness sucks.
I was still stun when she left the hall.
Chased after her, didn't really know where she went then I heard that she was upstairs.
Saw her busy. Could tell how she was actually feeling. Actually I can't. I'm not her.
I wanted to call out to her and hug her and stuff but I thought what if i did that, would she feel worse? I really didn't know what to do.
I felt so lost. There stood my friend, hiding all her emotions behind that strong looking face of hers and I just didn't know what to do. How to make it better.
The overwhelming feeling forced tears out.
Never in my life had I feel so strong for results. Results that were not even mine to begin with.
I hate myself.
_____
There I was feeling super overwhelmed and just wanting to let everything out.
For the first time, I spent an entire 12 ride awake, holding in.
Blinking hard looking straight into the fluffy clouds in the sky, wishing for...
After sending a text to president, i stun at my seat, not knowing if what i did was right.
Looked down, see screensaver, felt like my efforts of looking at sky was almost wasted.
I wanted to question everything. Why was the world created?
So many things flashed through my mind, so many thoughts just flood in, taking over the initial occupant.
You know, I still believe and I don't want to let this go...
How to be understanding when I don't bloodily understand any freaking thing.
That's it. Shall not write anymore things about this on my blog. Such things keep inside my heart can liao....... Too painful to write out and tear all over again.
_____
Amongst all these, I'm still telling myself there are people worst off than me.
I can't believe myself o_o'''
Labels: frowns everyday...
Just a random, average short girl who believes that life is a disaster in disguise as a blessing... Worrying has become a habit but anime will always remain engraved in my mind. =] Currently addicted to spacing out... And... Sleep is prioritised as number 1! People know me as Winnie. And I have roamed the Earth for 15 years. It all began on 14th September 1995...
2BN
6C
FLUTE
Amelia
Boon See
Celine
Celeste
Cherie
Cheryl
Cheng Cheng
Crystal
Denise the LOUD one
Eanxiang
Estee
Gloria
Firzanah
Hui Cong
Jeanette
Jia Ai
Jia Xin
Jillian
Jing Wei
Jing Ye
Ka Wing
Keith
Lee Hwee
Tan Winnie
Xin Hui
Xue Qi
Vincent
Vivian
Yu Li
Yun Jin
Somebody please whack me... Whack me hard so that I can wake up...
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